So, this one time, at [Jewish] camp...

...I love working for Jewish summer camp. I've worked at a few, I've attended more than one, and Jewish summer camping is where I want my career to be. So I'm always happy when Jewish summer camp comes to me, in the middle of the winter.

Benjie and I went on Poland / Israel Pilgrimage 9 years ago (yes, Benj, NINE). Then we worked together at Camp Ramah Darom for a few years, and we stayed in touch because he and Rafi are closer than most people in long-term romantic relationships. Benjie works for CRD, and he's in Israel hiring staff. I love hanging out with Benjie. Below are pictures from a variety of days in the shuk, a Ramah party, and nights just hanging around. Benjie even joined Rafi, Jeremy and me for a 2-dinner night. Ethiopian for me, boring regular restaurant for them.

Benjie, Rafi and I mug it in the shuk last Friday afternoon.

Pilgrimage may have been 9 years ago, but we're still making crazy faces in the shuk like we're children!

With Baylene and Benjie. Group 7 '99. At Hagigat Ramah.

That is love right there, ladies and gents.

Benjie, Rafi and I act out.

Jeremy shows off our waiter's name at dinner #2.

That's what Jeremy's little sign says. It was on the table at Rimon Cafe, which, by the way, has a long wait for the meat side, but not the dairy side.

I love camp! Not lamp, but camp. And I (we) had a great time with Benjie.

Ultra All Inclusive!

When I woke up at the crack of dawn on Thursday, I was not pleased. Not only was I exhausted, but I was greeted by a beautiful, peaceful blanket of snow. All of Jerusalem. The serene quiet that comes with a snow storm teased me, saying "you won't get to Turkey." I stuck out my tongue, got dressed in layers, and crunched my way to Rafi's to meet the 6:45AM sherut / shared taxi. Crunchy snow! And it was still falling! It was really beautiful, and probably the only reason I was able to maintain a semblance of happiness with my 6AM wakeup for a 1:45PM flight.

Before I wised up about the rain boots...

Rafi and I waited. And waited. And waited. And waited. 45 minutes, 20 frozen toes, a few snow-art attempts, a hideout in the slightly-above-freezing stairwell, and a bulldozer-turned-snowplow spotting later, the sherut came, and Rafi and I were OFF to Ben Gurion! As a bonus, we got a tour of all-snowy Jerusalem. It was really breathtaking. AND my toes finally unfroze by the time we got to the airport -- about 2 hours early for check-in.

And then, in Turkey, on the coast of the Mediterranean...my feet win!

The separation barrier and snow. We took Road 443, and the separation wall/barrier runs along the side of parts of the highway to the airport.

We finally checked in, went to the terminal to enjoy kosher McDonald's (something I am opposed to in real life, but support in the few kosher outposts in Israel), and then eventually to board our plane. As a Turkey-unrelated sidenote, I find it interesting that while I really dislike fast food (Not you, Subway. I love you!), find it wrong, and fattening, and gross, I REALLY loved going to McDonald's. Maybe it's the I-Don't-Eat-That-Stuff holier-than-thou mindset you get in college / high school when keeping kosher amongst those who do not. Maybe it's the horrible additives that McD's puts into their food, making me crave it. But I ate McDonald's at TLV like I was dining at my favorite New York Italian restaurant (bonus points if you guess correctly in the comments). I guess I can make allowances for a McDonald's that sells Israeli salad and McKebab.

Tel Aviv airport means one thing to kosher kids -- McDonald's.

I'm going to pretend that kashrut (or, in this label's case, Hebrew writing) makes McDonald's less disgusting. Yay, kashrut!

Super Size Me! I'm hooked!

The flight to Turkey was fine, as was the customs experience (here's $20 so you can give me a sticker), and the trip to the resort. Once at the resort, Rafi and I took to eating tons, walking around the hotel and on the other shore of the Mediterranean, and trying to figure out Turkish. We were, at best, wildly unsuccessful. I spent some time in the Turkish bath (amazing), and both of us spent time in the pool (not bad). On Saturday night, we went to a multi-lingual comedy show that was so terrible, words can't even describe it -- in German, Russian, English, OR Turkish. Let's just say any improv night at any given summer camp where we've worked displayed a finer grasp on comedy and creativity. It did really make the whole trip seem like a cruise, though.

As Rafi pointed out, that's Israel in the distance. Can't see Her? That's ok, you can trust me.

Requisite "Look, we went on vacation!" picture.

The best part of the trip? Apart from the visas and the Turkish bath, it was Ultra All Inclusive. Wine? Sure! Cakes? Of course! Italian dinner with 12 courses (give or take)? But of course! Rafi and I enjoyed that -- and the unlimited, FREE minibar.

Another "We went on vacation and we're so cute!" picture.

Ultra All Inclusive means that the minibar is FREE!

The trip back was uneventful (although we did stop in the outside-the-terminal McDonalds for an interesting lunch), and I've been doing schoolwork ever since. Let's hear it for a trip to the lovely land of Antalya, Turkey, where the weather rarely dips below 15 degrees Celsius (where rarely = when I am there).

We went back to McD's, Rafi got a McKebab, and it was AWESOME. Whyever don't they market it in the states?

Maybe the best thing about Turkey. In Turkish, "Stop" is "Dur."

PS -- Turkish delight is pretty repulsive. It's like passover jelly candy, but covered with powdered sugar, instead of granluated.

GREAT, just GREAT

This past Shabbat, Rafi and I walked the brisk distance to the GREAT Synagogue (the only link with a decent picture on Google) in the center of Jerusalem. We have a friend in the מקהלה / makelah / choir, and we wanted to see him in action. Here is what happened in our GREAT Shabbat experience.

1. The balcony was WARM. This was GREATly increased by the hot air (and there is plenty coming from the cantor and the choir, except for Dan, who is GREAT), floating to the GREAT balcony above the GREAT men's floor.
2. Bar Mitzvah: A kid had his Bar Mitzvah, and his various female relatives pelted the kid with GREAT candy from the balcony, after his Torah reading in the mid-room Torah-reading בימה / bimah / stage. Hearing hard candy hit marble and lightbulbs? You guessed it: GREAT!
3. The Bar Mitzvah kid's little brother was also with his candy-throwing relatives, which gave him a great point of view from which to see his dad and brother in action. He called out, in a GREAT, high-pitched baby voice, quite often during the service: "Abba! Abba! Abba! (Dad!)" Pretty much the entire service. He thinks his dad is GREAT!
4. Apparently, one of the Gabbaiim (the people, or men in an Orthodox shul, who facilitate the service participants, Torah readers, etc.), whenever he heard a kid in the balcony (like the one in #3), he'd put on a not-so-GREAT face, point his finger at the balcony, and made a motion, similar to "get that stupid child out of my opera." (Because going to the GREAT Synagogue is like going to an opera performance.) Rafi is my source for this. I had a great view of the whole building, but not such a close-up of the activity around the בימה / bimah / stage.
5. Cantor. Rafi seems to think that the GREAT Synagogue is the cantorial acme of the universe. But really, the cantor and the choir made the whole experience not unlike my home shul, Temple Beth Am in Margate, FL, in the days of our old cantor. If I hadn't been in a balcony and absolutely stewing in the heat, I could've closed my eyes and imagined myself at a Temple Beth Am GREAT choir Shabbat, circa 1997.
6. Choir. All jokes aside, Dan and the rest were...oh, fine...GREAT!
7. Kiddush. After shul, there's a GREAT kiddush with cholent, although I stuck to Diet Coke and cake. I had a 20-second interaction with a frum (religious) guy, who seemed to be trying to get around me to get cake. He started "flirting" with me (just barely). It can be intuited from this interaction that he flirted with me because I wasn't wearing a hat (which marks me with the scarlet "S" for "Single."). Rafi found this particularly GREAT.

After the kiddush, we walked to the King Solomon Hotel to have lunch with the Davidson trip group (not as GREAT as last year's trip, but pretty GREAT all the same.). We played Taboo in the lobby until lunch. Funny Taboo moments ensued: Rafi didn't get the cue words I used for "foxy" and I got angry when he called me a "poodle" instead. Rafi thinks the word "ring" is an onomatopoeia. British Taboo cards have words like "Bogey" on them. Also, my professor and his wife seemed to enjoy appearances of my dirty mind that was so popular on last year's trip. After Taboo, we had lunch, I spoke with my Assistant Dean for about an hour about Hebrew at JTS, and then Rafi and I ended up hanging around with friends there for the rest of the afternoon, until Shabbat was over.

Rafi and I took a short, GREAT walk to the Inbal hotel (about 5 minutes from one hotel to the other), to attend a Rabbinical School Admissions Deans' Oneg. I like being a significant other -- the perk of dessert at the Inbal being a GREAT one. I even get to go to the Rebbitzins' book club. (Tonight. Suite Francaise. Be there or be "S" for "Single".)

All in all, it was a really GREAT Shabbat.

The Adventures of Gezer Girl and the Fabby Cabbie

I should be asleep, but seeing as how I'm spending my birthday doing things I love, I am up at 2AM and I just took a nice, hot shower. Another thing I love to do is write things about myself, as I am a self-proclaimed narcissist, so here I am, on the blob.

On Wednesday nights, I enjoy the Conservative Yeshiva's learning community at Hebrew U. The way it works is they bring Schechter students (Rafi and some of my other favorite future-rabbi friends) to teach Torah to unsuspecting Hebrew U students looking for a free bagel. I've been joking that I'm Rafi's volunteer project, because if I don't go, he won't have a chevruta (friend/study partner) to teach. Deep down, however, I love the one-on-one attention, the text study, and the eating and schmoozing with my peers and the Rabbi who runs the program.

This week, Raf taught me how to read Rashi script. For those of you who either (a) know Hebrew fluently or (b) know about my passion for Israeli carrots, and the carrot in general, or (c) think I'm funny, will appreciate this vignette. I was (apparently doing very well at) mumbling out the right words with the screwy script (as if Hebrew isn't HARD ENOUGH TO READ), and translating , word by word. "Shmuel. Samuel." and "Hoo. He." and so on and so forth. Then I read "גזרותיו / g'zeirotav" and looked up at Rafi. "His carrots?" I said.

My carrot. Oh, I'm so very classy. Taken back when I was 25. Photo courtesy of Elana D., I believe.

After Rafi stopped laughing, he explained that that word means "His decrees" where "His" = God. I protested, saying that if a word has the root (get it? root! double meaning strikes again!) of G-Z-R / גזר, then it should have to do with carrots.

Ami, Rafi's California classmate explained that Sephardic (Spanish) Jews eat carrots on Rosh HaShanah to reverse any evil decrees. I'm going to start doing that! Ami is awesome. I love these Rab students....

Today, my Hebrew tutor told me that the Z / ז is actually adapted from a very ancient language that was folded into Hebrew, almost seamlessly. Funny how my "fun" learning and my "sooooo unfun" academic Hebrew learning lined up this week.

After learning, the CY funds cabs to take us back to town, which is nicer than taking the hour-long bus. Rafi and I piled in with his neighbor, the inimitable Gideon. Our driver this week, by chance, was driving a Benz (not so unusual), and I happened to perk up my ears to hear the music he was playing on the stereo. Usually, the cabs in Jerusalem play Galgalatz or some other popular music station. This guy was listening to the world's most offensive music, on his own, burned CD, so naturally I was in heaven, and started singing along and dancing around the backseat as much as the seatbelt allowed. The driver noticed, and turned up the music really loudly.

Not the cab I was in, but a cab nevertheless. This one was in Tel Aviv on 25 Dec 2007.

That's how I ended up driving by the Old City, just by the Western Wall, with the wind blowing through my hair, as Rafi, Gideon and I all boogied in the cab to classics such as "Smack Dat" by Akon (featuring an Eminem rap that includes the terrificly rapped "puddy-cat-dawls.") and "Fantasy" by Ludacris ([insert an inappropriate "lick" quote here]). It was ridiculous. But it certainly exposed one of the many polarities of Israel, which is currently my proposed thesis topic. I don't think I'd use those lyrics with campers. Or adults. Or anybody that may think it disgusting that I (a) know these songs and (b) find them, instead of offensive, highly entertaining. (HA! I JUST COMBINED OFFENSIVE MUSIC AND MY THESIS IN ONE PARAGRAPH.)

It reminded me of Larry, the Hebrew School driver from last year, who loved to show us his latest rap videos on the Escalade DVD player. He also often threatened to report to Rafi on Wednesdays (I worked on Tuesdays) how I knew all the dirty words, and that my dance moves were too good for a Hebrew school teacher.

This driver's name is Jeki. Let me know if you want his card. He's TONS of fun! But don't expect to be able to hear when you reach your destination.

Time for me to do something else I love, because it's my birthday. It's time for BED!

Sort of Bringing SBB Back

Rothberg was liberated from the strike today, so as the Israeli government and Senior professors continue to ruin lives, they have decided to spare mine. I'll be in Israel until June. Sorry, Mere and E and everyone else in NYC that I miss...

I'm not so much done with my work for my thesis, or with one of my midterms, but I figured it was time to post SOMETHING. Below are pictures of things that happened in Ulpan, before the strike and during Hanukkah. There are also pictures from visiting a funny falafel/schwarma place on Ben Yehuda street (a precursor to my Birthright Season post, coming soon!), and from the shuk, where I often find things interesting, or hilarious.

Countdown to 26: 4 days! Also, Merry Christmas to all of those non-Jews that turn to my blob for Jewish education.


"Do you think I'm on Birthright? Because I'm not." -- Fun at a schwarma place on Ben Yehuda. Highly recommended because of customer service and flavor of the food!

It worked on me, as you can see from the picture above. Also, I've been documenting ridiculous Israel spellings in translations of things here. Translation errors may be my most precious joy in life...

Fellow Ramah Aleph students join the guitar guy on the stage at the front of the classroom during our 8th-day-of-hanukkah shirah session. I felt like I was at camp. It was amazing. And it ended with free donuts. Heaven.

Mr. Ulpan Rockstar.

I walked into my Hebrew class to see my worst nightmare: Math. In Hebrew. And not even calculus!

The past two Friday nights, I have going to services at two different Breslav shuls -- one in Har Nof, which is super-dee-duper religious, and one in Katamon, which is also pretty religious, but not as fun. Their mechitza involves an upstairs, a separate door, and a latticework wall between you and the air above the men. It's pretty extensive, and not as good as the Har Nof shul. Points to Har Nof! (Rafi liked Lecha Dodi better at Katamon, but what can I say...he's cute, not perfect!)

Rabbi Nachum of Breslav was the big deal rebbe for these chasidim, which is why he has his own song. In the Hebrew it is: ...נ נח נחמ נחמן or in English: Na, nach, nachma, nachman... It's pretty sweet, it's just adding another letter each syllable. I find myself humming it when the Breslav mobiles blast it from their Ram Kol (microphones, like on cop cars, but louder) when they're going down the street. The other thing I like about Breslavers is that they wear Shtreimels. I LOVE these beaver (yes, I said beaver) hats. They're super-expensive, super-warm, and super-hilarious.

Signs like these let me know that I'm enjoying super-shmittah carrots.

The Special Bus

No Tel Aviv this Tuesday -- this week, it was Jerusalem Tuesday!

Anyway, Rafi (at his suggestion) said we should go on the double-decker Jerusalem tour bus ride. Now, in New York, I actively scoff at those buses, particularly when they pass underneath the windows of my Hebrew classroom, and I can hear the tour guide blabbing on about the historic whatever on 122nd Street. In Jerusalem, I am willing to play the tourist, and play tourist I did.

After a disgusting, but perfect (for Hannukah, perfect = fried) lunch of Chinese-esque food in the Central Bus Station*, which apparently doubles as a mall, we went to wait for the bus. The bus arrived, and some woman tried to steer her pipsqueak son to knock Rafi out of his way, in order to get the best seats on the bus, but I threw on a little New York attitude, elbowing Rafi and me onto the bus first. We were rewarded with front-row, upper-deck seats.

Sweet Chariot. Included in the fare is a narrated tour, punctuating Israeli/Jerusalem music. The music is Hebrew. The tour is in about 8 languages.

This was the best part of the bus ride for Rafi, who whined the entire time about how boring the ride is when you're familiar with the city. I pointed out that the stop-and-go traffic feel he was getting from the ride actually afforded us quite beautiful vistas. I also mentioned that had he not ditched his little narrative-delivering headphone, then the musical interludes would be keeping him occupied. He just sat quietly, fidgeting instead. No worries, though, as this wasn't my idea. AND, if I were forced on one of those buses in Manhattan, I would LOVE it. Because I LOVE Manhattan, now and forever.

Front row seats, before Rafi gave up on the narration. Wasted on Rafi, delightful for me.

Beit Ha-Sheonim / בית השענים / The House of the Clocks is just outside of the shuk. I learned about it in ulpan, and I finally got a picture (this time, before I was bogged down with bags of, what else, carrots!)

After the tour, I took a quick stop at the shuk, lit candles with Rafi, and went home to work on finals / midterms. Being enrolled in two graduate schools at once allows me to experience the joys of midterms and finals SIMULTANEOUSLY! It's a modern miracle, courtesy of the Internet. Thanks, Al Gore!

Say Happy Hannukah one last time, Kookies! It's the last night of Hannukah...until next year!

Rafi's Hannukiyah also shines bright on the eighth night!


*The Central Bus Station has tight security, so you should know that everybody's bag gets checked and many get x-rayed. Purses get a quick poke, without an x-ray, and the security guard today told me that my bag is cute. That was sweet of him.

In other security guard related news, I was asked by a guard recently if I had a gun in my bag. I told him I had books. He actually laughed.

"Celebrity" as Defined by SBB

Today's the second day of Chanukah! See? The Kooky Family glows a little brighter today!

School was OK today. In class, I said that I was "moderately religious" and one of my classmates said, "Aww, that's so cute" and I didn't smack her for being rude, so I considered that a success.

I was kind of bummed that I wasn't going to see Chancellor Arnie Eisen from JTS, as he was speaking at Hebrew U during my Hebrew class. I came to Hebrew and said hi to Yanik, the French guy who is a rockstar at learning Hebrew. He asked me what was up (all in Hebrew), and I told him I was sad that the "President" (Nasi / נשי - not sure how to spell that) of my school in NY was speaking during Hebrew class. I later learned that the word for Chancellor is Nagid / נגיד. I keep a-larnin'. Anyway, Yanik told me I was being silly, and I should go to the speech. So I talked to my teacher, and she told me it was ok, took my homework, and sent me to the speech. I really do have wonderful Hebrew teachers.

Eisen spoke about social activism, Abraham Joshua Heschel, and Martin Luther King. It was fascinating, and I think he's such an articulate, engaging speaker. I learned new things about Heschel, like that he marched with MLK (see the picture on wikipedia!).

Normal people get excited over star sightings (and even I'll regale you with my story of my John Linnell, of They Might Be Giants fame, sighting in a Manhattan Starbucks), but for me to hear a Jewish Educator speak...well, that's the real excitement for me! Furthering my excitement, Eisen was introduced and MC'ed by none other than Michael Rosenak, whose articles on Israel trips for teens and whose term "flooding out" describes how I operate. It was incredible.

I went to the last 15 mintues of Hebrew and picked up my assignments. My last class of the day started with homemade sufganiyot (jelly donuts, remember?) and we talked about Jewish identity and I said things that some of my classmates found appalling, so all in all, that class was good, too! The professor let us out a little early so we could light candles closer to sundown, and I lit with Rafi a little while later.

Rafi, Rafi's brother's girlfriend and I had dinner with some of Rafi's family friends, which was really special and tasty. It was nice to meet some of the celebrities of his family's collective life. Special foods for Chanukah were served, and since I'm a sucker for a good latke, I was very happy with the meal! Homemade applesauce like Bubbie and I make, and special Chanukah cookies closed out the day.

I hope everyone is having a lovely Chanukah wherever you're celebrating it, or if you're not celebrating it, then you're enjoying a jelly donut! They are, after all, really famous.

There's Gonna Be A Floody, Floody

Shabbat Parashat Noach (Torah Portion about Noah and the Great Flood) Report:

It seems we are incapable of hosting a meal for fewer than 12 people, and Friday night was a dairy-filled celebration of Noah and his ark. Rachel just wrote about the themed dishes created in honor of this week's torah portion, Noa(c)h.

There was a rainbow salad, with red peppers, carrots, yellow peppers, avocado, pomagranate seeds and raisins.

There was also a Noah's ark, constructed out of biscuit cookies, on a base of blue-pudding water, and surrounded by pairs of gummy animals (in Israel, gummies are KOSHER!). The ark had a rainbow of M&Ms on top.

Other bits of the meal included the delightful pairing of cheese and veggies, floating in a sea of red sauce on little pasta-sheets of ark, otherwise known as a veggie lasagna. There was another fine pairing of sweet potato and spices. Challah and fruit salad, wine and water, old friends and new, completed the meal.

And just when you were sure that you were totally full from reading this? Dairy dessert extravaganza at Rafi's apartment for his post-birthday party (someone seems to be celebrating himself for days at a time...it's almost like I've influenced him a little too much.). Many people stopped by, and the cakes and trifles were really spectacular.

The weather is getting cooler, and I very much appreciate it. Here I am, sitting on my couch, in the great city of Jerusalem. I'm sure that some day soon, it will start raining, but before the "floody floody" it's certainly delightful to be in Jerusalem in the fall.

I want COFFEE...and so on and so forth.

Rafi's birthday has been good for him, but there’s some stuff about Israel is getting to me. I will elaborate.

So, two days ago, I went back to Hebrew U to pay my bill, and I was fuming. I had logged in to see that they had added on a daily charge of $25 for no reason. I was ready to fight -- but my friend from Finance logged into the screen with my name on it (it was very bizarro-HR for me to be on the other side of the paycheck, or in this case, bill review.), looked quizzically at the screen, said, "No, that's not right," and deleted the charges without a peep from little-miss-almost-a-lawyer. I was ready to fight, but Finance Friend took care of it, without a PEEP from me. A miracle! The first non-frustrating interaction with Hebrew U to date!

On the way back, I went to Aroma (like Starbucks) to pick up coffee-oid drinks for Rafi and me. This time, I got one frappachino-thing, the Ice Aroma, and, after some coaching from Rafi, I even ordered a Caffe Kar Im Kerach, Im Sucar v' Chalav. (Iced coffee WITH ICE, with sugar and milk.) For the love of all that is holy, I just wanted to get coffee with ice in it. I really don't understand what Aroma's problem is. The girl at the counter was like, "so you want cappuchino?" She even had another customer translate her Hebrew (which I, for once, understood) and I was like, "I want COFFEE with pieces of ICE floating in it." She looked at me like I was crazy, and then had apparently hilarious conversations with other Aroma-workers about the crazy order with the coffee and the ice without coming from a blender, and WITH cubes!?! I don't really know why this was so funny...I am trying to think of a scene from a movie or TV that would accurately depict the scene, but I am coming up dry. (Brother Mark, any thoughts? Arrested Development, maybe?) They should spend a day on any street in NYC and THEN try to get one of their precious blended drinks from the guy in the little silvery booth, and then come back and make fun of my order. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

Later that day, I went to dinner with a friend from UF, who confirmed for me that I am, indeed, just like my younger brother Mark. It was great to catch up with him, to know I had another ally in Gator-game watching (Many of my Jerusalem Gators are named David, apparently), and to gorge on Burgers Bar. You can't get an order wrong at Burgers Bar, thankfully.

Irritating news continues with the story of today, aka, the world’s most frustrating day EVER. While Rafi was “celebrating” his birthday by traveling in the north of Israel with his rabbinical school classmates, Allison and I had some work to get done for our JTS Distance learning class, so we went to Hebrew U today with Robbie, Rafi’s roommate and my friend.

At school, I filled out the rest of my MASA grant information, which went well, and then everything else was sooo annoying. First, they didn’t have my insurance card yet. Not so annoying, except they said it’d be there for me on the 10th. It’s the 11th. Secondly, the printing in the computer lab was 100 times (literally) more than I thought it would be (0.20 agarot and 20 agarot? Totally separate things.*), and just as irritating. One printer with a hole for one printer card at a time? And it jams? Oh, for the love of God.
*Agarot (singular = agarah) : sheqels :: pennies : dollars. If you divide the shequel by 100, there are 100 agarot. A sheqel is approximately 25 cents, so an agara is approximately 0.25 cents. 20 agarot = 5 cents per page. 0.20 agarot = 0.05 cents per page. That amounts to a big difference when you are printing out an entire textbook.

I could rant about my JTS class, but that is not in the spirit of my ranting about Hebrew U. In this particular case, the printing for my JTS class and everything else from Hebrew U will be considered separate but equal.

By the way, did you know that Hebrew U is like THE most sponsored school I’ve ever been to? Sure, at UF we had the Marsden science library, and dorms named after people like Sledd, Murphree and Jennings, but at Hebrew U, everything is sponsored by friends of Hebrew U from Tarrytown, NY to Mexico to Australia (there is a whole center just called Australia, actually. Still can’t figure out why the country wanted to name a Hebrew U computer lab after itself, but whatever.). There is, actually, a hallway sponsored by some people from Tarrytown, shown here.
A HALLWAY? I have a better idea…How about, the charitable Cohens from Kansas City, Missouri, or the giving Goldsteins from Genoa, Italy, sponsor free printing at Hebrew U? Maybe just in the Rothberg school? Remove the hassle for the students? No? Yeah, you’re right…then it wouldn’t be Hebrew U.

This makes me miss JTS and its free, double-sided printing in the computer lab. Also, at JTS, they speak English. I cannot believe I am enrolled full time in more than one graduate school this year. I am nutso.

After the printing fiasco, and its accompanying trips to amazon.germany and amazon.uk, and a little lesson about her royal highness’s royal mail strike, we ended up getting stuff printed, front-and-back, in triplicate, in the Hebrew U print shop. The technicians there smoke cigarettes CONSTANTLY around the equipment, by the way. It reminded me of heated (heh) fire-related arguments this past summer at CIL.

Good times. The smoking by the machines, in the indoors room, is gross, but hilarious, and only in Israel!

Robbie then escorted me to pick up a student card thingie, only to find that AFTER I waited for 10 minutes, I had to take my student ID to photocopy it in a machine downstairs. Guess where the neariest copy machine was located? That’s right, just BEHIND the guys at the desk. I made the copy, paid for it, and then waited on line for another 10 minutes. I was at the end of my string…

Allison and I finally left Hebrew U, and traveled to Yaffo Street so I could attempt to return a skirt that didn’t survive its first washing after purchase. Even though I hadn’t put it in the dryer, they wouldn’t exchange it, or give me a refund. And I thought I left the ridiculousness of my day when I left Hebrew U.

Adventures in Literacy

I went to Hebrew U today, once again to bang my head against the walls and see what falls out of either the walls or my head. Today's adventure was a visit to the Library. After I got my "old-school driver's license-looking ID card" (that's a direct quote from my days of running orientation for Penguin) up and running in the library system, I battled with the computers to search the database for articles, books, or anything remotely related to my thesis topic, Israel Education in the Diaspora. The library wouldn't let me search in English all the time, I don't really know how to type anything useful in Hebrew, and the searching system isn't friendly when you switch to English format from Hebrew. Listings of, oh, the LOCATION of the book are LITERALLY covered up by translations. It took a whole lot of surfing to get some leads, but I wrote down about 9 books or journals to snag, and then I went looking.

I was thwarted on all accounts, only to be told, after a half hour of frustrated browsing, that the books I had written in my little notebook were in the Education library. Apparently, when the books are listed as "Education: 4th Floor" that means they're on the 4th floor of the Education library, which is in a different building, and is its own library, and of course, is a rather far walk from the main library.

I was frustrated, so I went and checked in on the status of my course signup stuff, and then went to the Academon (The School Bookstore). Ever-aware of my illiteracy, I purchased a few books to help me with my Hebrew:

The Cat In The Hat by Dr. Seuss (Shout out to Things 1, 2 and 4 -- My brothers!)

The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle (Hi to his Editor!)

AAAAAAAAAAand Where The Wild Things Are (Jerusalem, CLEARLY!)

I also got a dictionary called Rav Milon (the one recommended by every Hebrew/Ulpan teacher ever).

Photo credit: Amazon.com.

I even got a Yoman (day planner, pronounced Yom-man) that matches my backpack...Here's an upclose of the Yoman's cover. It's so cute!

See how it matches!?!

After forking over the (magnetic) cash for the new books and a Kif-Kef (it's an Israeli KitKat) bar, I ice skated my way (my shoes have no traction left, and everything in this city is made of smooth stone) to the Education library and found some of what I sought.

After Hebrew U, I finally got my Ulpan refund and an ice cream cone (Ice cream? Kif-Kef? Nice lunch, Sara Beth!) before going to a barbeque for Rafi, Rachel, and all the other rabbinical students in my life.

Time to practice my Hebrew reading...bye!

The Perfect...Pick Up Trip

The girls and I went today to the Sukkot Shuk (Feast of Tabernacles Market) outside of the regular shuk, Mahane Yehuda, to purchase lulav and etrog sets for ourselves, our friend Ita and my boyfriend Rafi.

Growing up, I loved Sukkot. I loved the one day, during Hebrew School, when we would all go to the Sukkah (temporary hut with palm fronds for a roof), cover it with our decorations -- paper chains, pictures of fruit, plastic fake fruit, streamers and glitter -- and then we'd have dinner there. Hot dogs, chips, and apples were always the menu. To this day, I have a love of hot dogs that stems from Sukkot at Temple Beth Am in Margate, FL. Until very recently, in fact, I associated hot dogs 100% with my childhood synagogue and would only eat them once a year, on Sukkot. Actually, now that I think about it, maybe the reason I like glitter and art projects (like AEPhi's clue week) is because of the sukkot decorations. Wow, pretty much everything I do is 100% Jewy.

Anyway, I still love sukkot. Another tradition at my shul is that they would purchase about 8 sets of lulav (a bound palm frond with myrtle and willow branches) and etrog (a yellow citron with a special stem-like tip called a "pitom.") for the congregation to use during the holiday (there's a prescribed way to shake the lulav and etrog (really)). I never got my own set, never felt like I needed it. In NY, I did feel a little left out, but always managed to share with my friends. But when you live about 10 minutes from the sukkot shuk, you go to get your own set. Because we got 5 sets, we got a crazy deal: 5 sets for 400 sheqels, and a little extra for the carrying cases. $10 a person! (Kudos to Rachel, read her blog entry on the Sukkot shuk here.)

But buying your lulav in the Sukkot Shuk isn't like getting the pretty, complete set in NYC. Oh, no. You pick out your individual myrtle branches, your preferred willows, your perfect palm frond. You handle and sniff a table of etrogim (plural for etrog) until you find the right one. It's a lot like JDate for religious items...the dati men in the shuk (we were the only three women I saw in the place, and we were told not to try the most religious neighborhood because women aren't allowed in the store there.) were inspecting every single myrtle leaf. I guess the holiest of myrtle branches must be picked from the rough, but I was happy with anything that was cut from the tree. I'm not picky...a lulav, for example, is not as important as a backpack, or a boyfriend.



Welcome to the Sukkot Shuk!



Nice shot of a table of Etrogim.



Ita teaches Rachel and me how to tie our lulavim correctly. Thanks, Ita!





Speaking of picking out a boyfriend, I went to Tel Aviv today to pick myself up a boyfriend. There was quite a selection at the Arrivals entrance, but I found myself a nice rabbinical student. Not too tall, not too religious, not too secular, this one's got red hair, is ridiculously smart and has an amazing smile.



Rafi eats the Shwarma he promised to enjoy for a family friend, who loves Adir Falafel/Schwarma on Emek Refaim. Rafi says, "Hi, Art!"










And best of all, like the perfect lulav, he arrived just in time...and just for me.

(I know that was cheesy. Try to clean up your barf and let me be cutesy for once. I'll go back to being snarky soon. I promise.)

Ouch! That Hertzaliya!

Rachel and I finally (after 2 weeks in Israel, it seems like forever) made it to Tel Aviv to visit Shiran and her family! We met her after work in Givat Shmuel (just outside of TA, close to Bnei Brak and across the street from Bar Ilan Univeristy) to hang out, watch the incredible (Israelis are funny) American show "Jack V'Jill" (Jack and Jill), and eat an incredible Israeli dinner, courtesy of Shiran's mom. Her sister is just out of high school and working in a bakery, and it's fun to talk about American TV with her. Her dad is from South America, and we butcher English, Hebrew, Spanish and a little American Sign Language (ok, that was just me) together. He's a happy, communicating man, and a rocking good time. Shiran's mom doesn't like to speak English, but she gets everything I say in Hebrew and English.

They're like my Israeli host family. I feel at home with Shiran and her mishpacha.

After dinner, we went to Hertzeliya, a port city close to Tel Aviv, to walk on the boardwalk and just hang out. There was an incredible art show on display -- big, painted flowers (like the Chicago cows) that were all done by high school students at an area high school. We had fun taking pictures of the flowers. It was a lovely night!

Rach and I (after a hilarious mad car chase) caught the bus from Bnei Brak back to Jerusalem. The bus was GROSS -- it was dirty and smelly and the AC didn't work. Rach and I were also 2 of very few people not dressed "modestly" on the bus. I wonder if, sociologically, the buses that run from poorer neighborhood (BB) are not kept up as well? The bus from Jerusalem Central Bus Station to the Tel Aviv Central Bus Station is always very nice, with a mix of dati (religious) and chiloni (secular), and it's clean. Maybe it was because it was 9:45 at night. Maybe I should be doing my thesis on the sociology of inter-city buses in Israel.

Gotta go -- we're buying Lulav and Etrog today for Sukkot (I'll explain on the next post) and then RAFI will be here! Wheeee!




I love my Shiran!



We make a great team! Rachel, Shiran and I enjoy Hertzeliya!




For a girl with wanderlust, the greatest fixture on the boardwalk -- where to go next?!




Political messages from high schoolers -- very cool.




Wishes for all of the fine things in life in Chamsas, hand charms that are meant to protect the wearer or bearer from the evil eye.